It's almost Christmas time! I can feel the coldness of the wind at night and the shopping rush of the people. Christmas season is the best time to be with family to celebrate the holidays seasons together. There's no other place in the world to best celebrate this joyful time than at home.
My Christmas used to be very fulfilling. I'm am very excited to go to malls with big sales, to Christmas bazaars and to any place where you can buy Christmas gifts and decorations at very lows prices. There's a feeling of fulfillment every time I was able to buy the item that I really like. After buying those stuffs I am still excited to go home to show it to my mom and to Grandma, and of course they will give compliments to the things that I bought. My mom and I used to shop together during this time of the year because we share same joy and feeling every time we buy some things for our family and relatives.
I am the one who sets up our Christmas Tree. Last 2008, mom and I went to the mall to buy Christmas decorations for our house and to replace the old stuffs hanging on the Tree. After setting up the Tree, I turned the Christmas Lights on, you can feel the lights reflecting on our eyes which makes it sparkle. My Grandma is my No. 2 fan, (Mom is of course the 1st) since the Tree was placed near at the front door, every time Grandma enters our house, she never fails to praise how beautiful it is and how she would like to have her own Christmas Tree too. This was 2008.
Year 2009, I set up the Christmas Tree alone, Mom was not with us anymore because she left last October 2009 and spent the Christmas holidays in OH. This time, my No. 2 fan becomes my No. 1 . Grandma visits our house more often than last year to check us out since mom is not around. She will visit us several times at different times in a day.
Now, year 2010. Christmas Tree was set-up, placed on the same area right after the front door. Same decorations, added some stuffs which Mom brought from the US. It is still beautiful. However, I never heard any compliments any more from Granmda. My No 1 fan will not be able to visit us and praise the how beautiful the Christmas Tree is. (Grandma passed away last April 13, 2010) Christmas lights do still sparkle but there some sorrow in it already, I cannot feel the same joy of Christmas which I have felt before. This Christmas is indeed, different.
And as days pass by, my brother and lil sister will go to OH before Christmas too. So I will be left all alone at our house on that used to be a special day. Although my eldest sister is still here, I don't feel spending and celebrating Christmas with her because Christmas means "Family", "Care" and "Sharing" and I cannot feel it from her. On other hand, this loneliness is still bearable because my cousins, Uncle and Aunts are living next door so I will still be able to celebrate this wonderful season at the very least.
(I'm carrying my 2yr old niece. Picture was taken last Nov 14, 2010. I dont look good coz i've had flu for three days)
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